May 10, 2009


This is my mom. Hi Mom. That's Max with the goofy grin and cousin Reid looking darling. Last summer Mom took us all to Williamsburg, VA for a lovely week of soaking up the rich heritage of our country. It's an amazing place and the boys had a great time, but I know my mom, and there was an ulterior motive at work. She was still, 41 odd years later, hard at work, mothering her two daughters. She was reminding us of the things she has spent a lifetime teaching us, of the things that we will spend a lifetime teaching our own children.

OK. That was supposed to be just the caption for the picture and I got carried away. It's no small thing writing about your mother. Let's begin.

I like mothering. I love mothering. Being a mother will be my highest calling.

I believe that this is true for me because of one simple thing.

I have a wonderful mother.

(and father, too, of course. But hey, it's mother's day) I am MOST THANKFUL to be able to say that I had a wonderful childhood. It was full and rich and my memories are pristine. Until you are grown and doing it yourself, it's hard to know what went into it. You reap the benefits, but you don't fully KNOW how hard your mom worked and how jammed pack her days and nights must have been. Thanks mom. Good mothering is optional. You can contract it out, you can check out, you can let your personal demons screw it up pretty good, you can be emotionally bankrupt, you can let your kids fend for themselves.
I wouldn't know about any of these options. My mom TOOK CARE OF BUSINESS!

Here are, but a few of the things that I will be forever grateful for and that will help form the adults that my own children will one day become . (cool how that works, isn't it?!)

  • I have a DEEP appreciation for language, literature, poetry, the written word, grammar, and the importance of being able to express oneself clearly and creatively. (will you proofread this for me,mom?) The other day I sent a letter home with the weekly newsletter at Max and Lew's school about a fundraising project. Max sat in the car and read it as we went home. He looked at me and said, "I can tell that you wrote this, it's more flowery and feeling than most stuff people write." Score! Thanks mom!
  • I never leave the house without a belt on. What was with the belt obsession, mom?
  • I love art and all things creative. Thank you for dragging me to all those T.E.F. concerts, to plays, the ballet, Broadway, art lessons, piano, for teaching me to sew, for being an artist yourself.
  • Thank you for your love of the garden. For identifying plants by name. For making special nooks and crannies in the yard. For gathering flowers and greenery from yards and ditches and turning them into beautiful arrangements for others all over town. This is now a part of me and you have a grandson who can identify most any plant by name. Again, funny how that works.
  • Thank you for always having 'the family table'. I always assumed that all families did this. Not so. I do, and I think that it makes a difference at a core level.
  • Thank you for calling the TV the 'idiot box' all my life. My children will one day thank you, the poor TV-less things.
  • Thank you for quoting great men. "Discretion is the better part of valor." God knows, don't we wish more people had learned that one! (Dad, I got the "God Knows" from you, actually, and as I think about it, I've never really heard it anywhere else....) And how about this, Mom. I thought that YOU came up with the saying 'To whom much is given, much is required" up until my highschool graduation. Thank you for your devotion to serving others, and the lesson therein.
  • I really like this one and you might not realize that I picked this up from you. "It's better to ask forgiveness than permission" Thank you for always being bold and capable and strong and assertive. And that brings me to....
  • Your 'can-do' attitude. You have always been positive and joyful and confidant. Because of you, I have always believed that I am capable of most anything.
  • Thank you for dragging me to church every Sunday of my life. You and Dad set the bar as high as it gets in the moral standards category, and then you lived up to it every single day. This one thing has probably shaped me more than anything as an adult. I stand on solid ground because of you. Thank you.
There is so much more. I've hit the high notes for the world wide web to see, and I could go on and on, but I think you get the gist of things. I am grateful TO you and thankful FOR you.

Happy Mother's Day.


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